Diary of Fatherhood

It’s one of those dragging mornings again with Ofu, my self-declared “not-a-morning-person” son. And yes, Sweetheart and I have had several burnouts with him. Ofu prefers to share bathrooms with us instead of with his siblings. So, his towel and toiletries are in our bathroom. When he woke this morning, he went into our bathroom, stayed there for a while, then left and went to the game room and started playing on his device. I was already awake and even…

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“I didn’t grow up having that kind of relationship with my father.” “Every lady wants to be complimented.” The first of the above was a lady’s response to what I thought should have been an endearing moment between a father and his daughter. Immediately, I perceived a relationship gap! The second was another lady’s remark after receiving a compliment. To me, that highlighted the need for affirmation. Hopefully, I wasn’t being stereotypical, but as a reflective learner, statements like those…

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This is one of those times that, as a parent, I do more of the talking. Sweetheart and I were going to drop John off at his First Homecoming. Sweetheart had earlier “occupied the passenger seat” and said this final pep talk (if you like) will be mine to handle. So, I took the driver seat and began: “Remember all our conversations about relationships with girls. The number one thing they need from a guy is protection. Do not do…

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On our way to dropping Ofu in school this morning, I asked about his friend (name withheld for privacy), whom I last remembered was yet to resume this school year. Ofu: “I think he must have left Holmsley.” Me: “Really? Why?” Ofu: “He felt unsafe because they called him…” Me: “Oh no. That’s not nice and, it must have hurt his feelings.” Ofu: “Yes. It did.” Me: “What did you do to help him?” Ofu: “I talked with him. I…

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Sweetheart had an early morning appointment, so she woke early and left. So, I did morning devotions by myself and, this is not unusual depending on our schedules. When I get home from work very late at night, I tend to sleep a little longer into the morning if I don’t have an early appointment. If Sweetheart has an early appointment on one of those mornings then, I get to do morning devotions by myself and vice versa. So, I…

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After I published my book, Diary of Fatherhood (Series One), someone asked me why I didn’t include my wife’s stories in it. Well, I responded by with, “if I did, then it would no longer be a fatherhood but, a parenting journal.” That is not to minimize the influence of Sweetheart on our joint parenting adventure or even on my fatherhood journey. If anything, she probably has more stories to share than I do because she spends more time with…

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Ofu received an Xbox gift card as one of his birthday gifts. He accidentally destroyed some parts of the code while scratching off the cover with scissors. I noticed that he walked away sadly to his room and asked what was wrong. Then he told me what happened. I empathized with him and said that I will try to fix it. I called Microsoft customer support but, it was past their business hours. Fortunately, they have 24 hours online chat…

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On our way back home from Agbenu and Ofu’s swimming lesson, I asked about their progress. Agbenu: “It’s going ok but today I noticed that I need to beat with the whole of my legs not just my feet.” Me: “Ok. Ofu, how about you?” Ofu: “Good. My speed is getting better with my front strokes. But I did something bad with my backstroke.” Me: “What happened?” Ofu: “My belly was under the water and it has to be above…

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Someone was once asked why they never attend their child’s award ceremonies in school. They dismissed it as trivial. Their child, who is a gifted student has only been cheered for by his teachers and other students in his many award ceremonies. I imagined the child looking through the crowd in the successive awards if the one might be that in which they will see their parent cheering them up enthusiastically but to no avail. When the person told me…

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On our way to John’s swimming class, we drove for a while in silence then I got a hunch to ask him how things were going with him. You know, men are wired to carry on silently in each other’s company without much chit-chatting, yet no threat will be posed to their relationship. That was the mood I perceived initially as we drove on. However, I couldn’t resist the urge to ask him the question. Me: “So what’s been going…

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