Can I Help?… That’s Why We Are Men.

Can I Help?… That’s Why We Are Men.

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Sweetheart received a text message from our neighbor informing us that a branch of a tree in our backyard fell on our fence.

We rushed into our backyard to assess the situation. I saw that we could use our saw to cut off the excesses and relieve the pressure from our fence and the street. There was a minor damage to our fence, which I could fix with my DIY tools.

I called and notified my work that I’ll be running late due to an emergency. Then I got our ladder, climbed up to get an overview. Oche came out and asked:

“Can I help?”

Sweetheart: “No, thanks. We’ll call you if needed.”

I knew that that was her mother’s instinct telling her to protect her child from possible harm. However, the risk was not so much for Oche to be involved. I also knew he was using his problem-solving attitude, which I am encouraging, as a necessity for responsibility. I didn’t want him to miss the opportunity, so I said:

“Yes. Please go to the garage and bring the saw and toolboxes.”

His face lit up with excitement. He rolled up his sleeves and walked away with bold steps to carry out the directives. – Lesson: involving him made him felt relevant.

After he left, I explained as above, to Sweetheart why I opted to include him. She saw reasons with me.

When he returned, we swung into action. I sawed off the branches into pull-able sizes from our fence, while Sweetheart and Oche dragged them to our backyard.

After the branches were all brought in and leaves blown off the street, Oche and I worked on cracks in our fence. We nailed back the planks onto the frames. As we did, we talked. I incorporated science into it so he can relate it to his studies. I showed him to maintain the hammer at the appropriate angle such that its impact on the nail should drive the nail straight into the planks and not bend it. He, in turn, shared with me his planned carpentry project for this year’s boys scouts camp in the summer.

By the time we were through, I said:

“I’m proud of you for stepping up to help without being asked. That’s what men do. That’s why we are men.”

He smiled and said:

“Thanks, dad.”

Me: “This is what the book that I’m reading for April talks about. It says as men, we were made to be responsible and solve problems. We don’t just sit around and watch things go wrong. We do something about it to fix it. And that’s what we have done today. I’d like us, just you and me, to go out when things open up after COVID-19 and, I’ll tell you more about what the book says about men. It’ll be a fun day. We’ll go out to eat and talk, then maybe end up watching a movie or something.”

Oche: “That will be fun! Oh yeah, dad, we can wear the red t-shirt that mom bought for you and me recently.”

Me: “Sure, that will be good! Now, it’s time for me to get ready for work.”

Oche: “Ok, dad, bye.”

As he walked away, I couldn’t help being grateful to God to watch Oche assuming responsibility, especially today. I was even more excited to experience the lessons from my book reading for April. It is titled: “Raising A Modern-Day Knight: A Father’s Role in Guiding His Son to Authentic Manhood” by Robert Lewis. Here’s a little background.

Towards the end of 2019, I attended a book fair with Oche and my niece, Ene. The fair encouraged reading culture. After the fair, we decided to have a reading challenge in 2020 to include other family members. Our goal is to read at least one book a month. That’s how my book for April came into the picture.

I’m loving every moment of my fatherhood experience.

  • 4/19/20

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