I wrote a post on my Facebook titled:

“The Spread Of The Mad Man’s Fire: COVID-19 Shows We Are More Connected Than Separated.” It is available at this link 

An excerpt from the post reads:

“We are all compelled to utilize the downtime to bond with our families… For those of us, who are now homeschooling our children through the online resources of school districts, we are better appreciating the works and patience of school teachers…” 

That is a true reflection of my experience in these strange times. For our children, what appeared initially to be an extended spring break in which they’ll indulge in fun activities, is turning out to be a working break.

Their daily schedule after breakfast is basically to log into their school portal and do whatever is lined up, per course, or subject per day: read the lesson, see an example and complete an activity. We give them the freedom of how they utilize their time to complete their work per day. Our goal is to complete all schoolwork by 4 pm with break, lunch, and snack times. Oche likes to stagger his schedule with work and play in succession. Agbenu and Ofu prefer to knock off theirs before launching full-time into play for the rest of the day.

It can be challenging for us as parents to assume the full-time roles of teachers. Our children are not always excited when we tell them it’s time to get on with schoolwork and so it has been a daily dose of gentle reminders. In addition to getting them to start, we must also monitor their work and correct it as necessary. When they resist because of the prospect of a redo, the premise on which we hold our ground is based on the following questions about real class situations:

“Do your teachers give you activities and then back off without checking on you?” The answer is usually a – no.

“After your activities, do your teachers check to see if you did them right?” The answer is usually a – yes.

“What happens if you do not get some right?” Our teachers correct us.

Me: “Those are the roles mom and I are playing now. We are just trying to help you stay on top of your schoolwork.”

With these gentle engagement, Sweetheart and I are able to secure their cooperation. So that’s a peek into the academic aspect of our present situation.

We also engage in physical activities like bicycle riding, basketball, soccer, and football in our front yard. They also spend time playing games on handheld devices as well as watch TV. That’s a glimpse into our extracurricular activities.

We have also stepped up our spiritual strengthening. On the Facebook post I mentioned above, I mentioned that “…our prayers for ourselves, others and the whole world are now more fervent. Psalm 91 has become a daily recital…” Our family devotionals and meditations have become more dynamic and blossom. We are more consistent with pausing and reflecting on the scriptures. 

Last night, we meditated on Psalm 46, which Agbenu read for us. Verse 8 states:

Come and see what the Lord has done, the desolations he has brought on the earth.

Psalm 46: 8

After she finished reading, she said:

“I have a question: in verse 8, why does it tell us to come and see what God has done, the destruction He brought on the earth? Why would God create all the beautiful people and things, then destroy them? I don’t get it.”

Me: “I see what you mean, mama. I think if we read from the beginning to end again we’ll see the answer. Let me read it.”

So I read it at a slower pace. 

Me: “We see that God blessed His people and they were doing well and then they turned their back on God, and He let them be for a while. That’s when bad things happened to them but as they turned back to Him for forgiveness, He changed His mind and the destruction stopped. So in that painful moment, they remembered their God but God doesn’t want His people to remember Him only during tough times, He wants us to be with Him at all times. See much we have prayed for ourselves and for the whole world because of the coronavirus. We didn’t pray this much before now, right? See how we read the Psalms every day now. Now, God has our attention from all the busy lifestyles. All that we are doing now is what we should be doing in ordinary times.”

Agbenu: “So did God send the coronavirus to destroy the world?” (With an emotion-laden voice). 

Me: “No, mama I don’t think so. But because of it, we have slowed down a bit and are spending more time with God.”

Agbenu seemed unconvinced as she started to look sad.

Then suddenly Oche asked:

“Why is there so much fear if only 16 people have died?”

(Not sure where he got his number from, but it wasn’t relevant at this point.)

Me: “16 people is not only. Even one person is not only. One life is very important. God does not want any life to be destroyed. Do you guys remember the story of the lost sheep in the bible?”

Oche and Agbenu: “Yes.”

Me: “Didn’t the Shepard leave the 99 sheep and go after the lost one?”

Oche and Agbenu: “Yes.”

Me: “That’s how one life is important to God. There are two other similar stories in the bible. Do you know them?”

Agbenu: “The lost coin.”

Oche: “The Prodigal son.”

Me: “Exactly. Oche, remember we heard that story in church recently?” 

Oche nodded in agreement.

Me: “So you see how one life is important? To some, the person who has died may not mean anything to them but it means the whole world to their loved ones. God forbid, if something should happen to me today, someone else may say, a man just died and then move on. But to you, your world has changed. You see how important one life can be?”

They appeared too distressed to respond. Agbenu’s eyes were welling with tears. I figured that I went overboard with the details. I gave them too much information than they could comprehend. I think, my fear also manifested.

Oche: “Mama, are you ok?”

Agbenu sat still with tears rolling down her face. We all gathered around her. Thank God, He instantly gave me a consolation idea.

Me: “I know it sounds scary, but we don’t have to be afraid. God is still watching over us and the whole world. Also, we have done a great job so far and I want us to keep doing so. See, every time we play catch or soccer in our front yard or play basketball or you ride your bicycles and being cheerful, it gives light and hope to our neighborhood. Our senior neighbors who don’t have anybody visiting them at this period feel encouraged when they hear your exciting voices as you play outside. That is so good and I’m sure that God is very happy with you for that. Ok?

She nodded in agreement. Oche and Ofu smiled. Their relief was palpable and I cautioned myself against information overload.

Me: “Come on, it’s bedtime.”

We walked them to their rooms, hugged, and exchanged goodnight.

I love the resilience of children.

This morning, they awoke fully back to life. We opened a new bottle of vitamin c, which Oche takes with Sweetheart and me. Ofu and Agbenu take the children’s gummy vitamin c. As I gave them their doses, I explained to Oche that this is a chewable tablet unlike the ones we just finished, which was slowed with a drink.

Oche: “Why?”

Me: “Because these are made to be quickly absorbed into our blood when we chew them.”

Oche: “So what will happen if we swallow them?”

I got impatient and wanted to quickly end his questioning. I thought of saying “it can kill of we swallow it.” Then I quickly recalled last night and I bit my tongue.

Me: “I have never tried it before but I know that we will be safe if we follow the instructions on how to take them. It’s like a user manual for a device. It tells us how to it set up, what to do, and what not to do, and so on. Ok, remember what happened when we didn’t follow the user manual when we were setting up our basketball hoop?”

Oche: “Oh yeah! That was not good at all. Now I get it. 

Me: “Exactly, let’s just stick with the instructions and we’ll be good.”

Indeed, the lockdown has exposed us to a variety of experiences ranging from homeschooling, increased spiritual awareness, the test of patience and other issues such as adversity which I don’t understand and so can’t provide satisfactory answers to my children’s curiosity. However, leaning on God, the source of our spiritual strength has been very uplifting. Like I always say, this journey is about documenting my experience as it is and not about showcasing how to parent. In retrospect, there is always a takeaway, like how I better answered Oche’s questions today than I did last night. 

The LORD also will be a refuge for the oppressed, a refuge in times of trouble. And they that know Your name will put their trust in You: for You, LORD, have never forsaken them that seek You. 

Psalm 9:9-10

• 4/3/20